1Then it came to pass in the Land of Entitlement that the Word became Change and the Change became Hope and the Hope became Change You Can Believe In. 2And The Obamessisah went about all fifty-seven states, teaching at their Caucuses and Primaries, healing malaise among the poor in spirit, and preaching the gospel of Progress. 3Then His fame went throughout all the land; and they came to Him all people who were afflicted with Bush Derangement; and those who were hopenitized; moonbats and troofers; and He wooed them. 4Great multitudes followed Him - from Chicago to Jersey, and beyond the Hills of Beverly.
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5 And seeing the multitudes, He went up on a mountain and stepped into the floodlights where they had built for Him a temple, and His disciples gathered around Him. Then He opened His mouth and taught them, saying:
6 "Blessed are the poor,
For theirs is the kingdom of State expropriated wealth.
7 Blessed are the jobless,
For the taxpayers shall be their keepers.
8 Blessed are those who lost their homes,
For they shall inherit a bailout.
9 Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for Change™,
For they shall be filled with a great taxpayer-funded feast.
10 Blessed are all who have grievances,
For they shall be compensated through civil rights lawsuits.
11 Blessed are the peace protesters,
For theirs is the Progressive World of Next Tuesday™.
12 Blessed are those one illness away from disaster,
For they shall obtain free health care. (...)
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